I don't know where to start on my memories of you- mostly because they are memories that we didn't get to have. I still dream of you, of having you here in my arms, of teaching you about life, laughing with you, celebrating your birthday, but God had other plans for you and me. But I am gratful, I not only have the memory of your birth and a not so fond memory of your death but I also have the few months of memories that you spent in my belly. The long nights that I couldn't sleep because you wouldn't let me get comfortable so instead I rubbed my belly and talked to you and told you all about life and what your family is like and how loud your daddy snores. I have the memory of our first ultrasound, you looked like a peaunt. The first time I heard your heartbeat, your first movements, your first pictures. And there was no denying you were my child cause you were such a stinker to all the nurses, you wouldn't hold still when they tried to find your heart beat, but all I had to do was put my hand on my belly and talk to you and you would stop moving and cuddle up to your momma's hand. Oh son I could go on forever so I'm going to end this with a poem I found that I think is just perfect for you and me....
It is I whose kicks you will always remember,
I who gave you heartburn that a dragon would envy,
I who couldn't seem to tell time and got your days and nights mixed up.
It is I who acknowledged your craving for peach ice cream by
knocking the cold bowl off your belly,
I who went shopping and helped you pick out the "perfect" teddy bear for me,
I who liked to be cradled in your belly and rocked off to
dreamy slumber by the fire,
It is I who never had a doubt about your love,
It is I who was able to put a lifetime of joy into an instant.
-Pat Schwiebert
I love you so much son! Tell your Unlce Justin that I love him and miss him terribly and that he better be nice to you. Until we meet again always remeber that your mommy loves you with all her heart!
